"SUCCESS MANTRA" # 117

TOPIC: ASSERTIVENESS SKILLS

HANDLING CRITICISM

Criticism is useful because it provides feedback on the effects of your behaviour, and you

can decide on whether or not it is beneficial to you. Sometimes criticism is malicious,

unjustified or just plain wrong. Here is a basic procedure or checklist to help you deal

with it.

1. Is the person qualified to make the criticism; do they know you well enough?

2. Is the behaviour being criticised something it is possible for you to change?

(Remember, it is almost impossible for you to change your personality. If you are

naturally ‘shy’ or ‘independent’ that is the way you are and the other person will

have to accept it. You can only change your behaviour).

3. Are you conscious that you do what is being criticised? If not, monitor yourself as

to how often and in what circumstances the behaviour occurs.

4. Does your criticised behaviour occur frequently enough to warrant your attention?

5. Are the results of your criticised behaviour significant enough to warrant your

attention?

6. Reflect on why you might behave in that way - what benefits or disadvantages

might there be for you in continuing with it?

7. Think whether or not you wish to change your behaviour; what would be the

advantages to you?

8. Make the decision whether or not to change, and act on your decision.

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